The effects of social media on relationships
Dinner done, Nuga settled down on her favourite sofa ready to catch up on all the reels her friends had been sending to her all day. Just as she picked up her phone, her husband, Folabi, asked if they could have a quick conversation.
“Gimme a minute dear,” Nuga retorted but unfortunately, Folabi wasn’t having it this time. Enough was enough! Nuga has to understand that he needs more from her beyond the tasty meals she prepares. He feels they don’t spend enough time talking about themselves as a family and the challenges they are going through. The thing is, Nuga never does more than scroll and swipe through social media once she’s home. She kept acting unmarried while very much so and Folabi had had enough of this.
Social media, I can state categorically, is one of the many blessings of technology. The networking, ease of access, an opportunity to work remotely, grow one’s business, and even find one’s life partner online, are just a few of the many perks of this platform. Sadly, as beneficial as it is, social media is not always good. As a matter of fact, studies now prove that it is a leading factor in the disruption of family life and friendships. It has also led to the untimely death of many like the promising young man who took his own life some months ago when he chatted up an AI chatbot that posed as a human therapist. How about the other young and even old people falling into the hands of sexual, religious, and most especially, financial predators on social media? Social media platforms have indeed become the bane of our society and romantic relationships are not spared from their dangerous effects.
Let us see three ways this menace ravages relationships:
False promises
Bisi broke things off with Bode when she met Jamil in hopes that she had found the love of her life. She was tired of dating the unseriousBode who had made her the “Lord of his ring” for three years without taking the next step. Unfortunately, she became prey in the hands of Jamil, who sold her to traffickers which made her beg for death daily. How did Bisi fall, you ask? Jamil had proposed marriage to her and also promised her relocation to Dubai. This appealed to her and made her eat the bait hook, line, and sinker. The outcome…Becoming a victim of trafficking!
There are so many lies flying about on social media. What you make of them will either make or mar you and your relationship(s). Yes, a lot of people have found the love of their lives via social media, but numerous others have become ensnared in a trap they now pray and work fervently to be free of, and that is for those lucky enough to still be alive. So, we need to be wary not to fall victim.
Unhealthy comparisons
Many relationships suffer strains because the concerned couples get carried away by what they see online. They want every day to be Christmas, not minding that many of the so-called celebrities who show off the glitz and glamour online do what they do for fun and that what they use is oftentimes borrowed (on credit). An international pastor recently exposed one of such celebrities who was homeless, squatting on the couch in the living room of one of her friends, yet still taking and posting several jaw-dropping pictures of houses and cars that are not hers online.
Why not appreciate your partner for who they are? You don’t have to push your woman to depression or the point of going under the knife in the name of BBL just so she looks “presentable” according to social media standards. In the same vein, your man should not become less of a man because he cannot afford expensive push gifts like diamonds and cars. Have you considered that s/he can make your dream come true and become unkind, broke, or even dump you afterwards?
The thief of time
Whatever your love language is, I have no doubt that you value quality time and attention with your loved ones. I also understand that once we go online, prying ourselves off could be a herculean task, yet we must realise that it is what we pay attention to that thrives. Please do not be so vested in your online relationships and activities that you forget to be physical. As a matter of fact, I believe in sharing reels and photobombing your partner as much as it will keep you in love and connected. Yet, I believe more strongly in setting everything aside, as much as time avails, to focus totally on each other, absorbing each other’s presence and energy.
I understand that there are legitimate reasons why we may need to spend time online, but we sincerely have to check how much of our lives we allow this tool called social media to control us. Do not allow social media to deprive you of building a rich, loving, and nourishing relationship with your partner.
