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THE POWER OF A “DUSTBIN” IN MARRIAGE : Pastor Isaac Olutimehin

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2 Kings 5:1-4 KJV.
“Now Naaman, captain of the host of the king of Syria, was a great man with his master, and honourable, because by him the Lord had given deliverance unto Syria: he was also a mighty man in valour, but he was a leper”.
[2] “And the Syrians had gone out by companies, and had brought away captive out of the land of Israel a little maid; and she waited on Naaman’s wife”.
[3] “And she said unto her mistress, Would God my lord were with the prophet that is in Samaria! for he would recover him of his leprosy”.
[4] “And one went in, and told his lord, saying, Thus and thus said the maid that is of the land of Israel”.

*MESSAGE*

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☆☆☆ Everyone has a “But” but we are not concentrating on “But” in this message.
☆☆☆ Naaman’s CV was quite interesting and intimidating 👇
1. An army Commander.
2. A great man.
3. Highly regarded by his master.
4. The Lord gave Syria victory through him.
5. A valiant soldier.
6. Well connected.

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☆☆☆ However his CV concluded by saying *”but he was a leper.”*
☆☆☆ When Naaman walked down the street in his shining armour, little boys saw him as a role model and desired to be like him when they grew up.
☆☆☆ What they didn’t know was that behind the beautiful military uniform, shining armour and breastplate, Naaman was dying of leprosy.

■■■ In marriages and families, we often hear, “my husband is very intelligent and hardworking “But” he is stingy.
■■■ My wife is very beautiful and confident “But” she is lazy.
■■■ My daughter is very spiritual and prayerful “But” she’s careless.
■■■ My son is very friendly and bold “But” he is hot tempered”.

*When we are courting, we see our best but when we are married we see the rest!*

☆☆☆ Nothing remains as it first appears, intimacy reveals the flaws in every relationship.
☆☆☆ If you are 100 meters away from a friend, you may not see the pimples on his face but if you walk up to him and stand a few inches from his face, you will surely see them.
☆☆☆ There are things you will never see about another until you live together under the same roof.

■■■ *Now to the main discussion for today:*
■■■ The hero in the story of Naaman was not Naaman but his wife. In the period they lived together as husband and wife, when a man was confirmed to be leprous, he would be quarantined; locked outside the city 👇

2 Kings 7:3 KJV
And there were four leprous men at the entering in of the gate: and they said one to another, Why sit we here until we die?

■■■ The wife of Naaman could have left the husband because he was leprous but she did not. She stayed back not as a roommate but as a spouse. She didn’t despise him. She didn’t tolerate him but she celebrated him.
■■■ More importantly, she treated her slave girl so well that the slave girl was willing to direct her to where her husband could receive his healing.
■■■ Imagine if Naaman’s wife was the type that verbally abuse and beat her househelp mercilessly, am sure the poor girl would have preferred her to be a widow rather than having her husband healed.
■■■ We must learn to treat people well because we may not know who God will use to usher us into our next level of blessings.

For example:
■■■ David treated well, the Egyptian, he met on his way to recover his wives and children and in turn the Egyptian led him to where the Amalakites were (1 Sam 30:11-16). Treat people well beloved.

■■■ What was it that made Naaman’s wife to stay with her spouse in spite of his “But” and became an instrument for his healing?
■■■ I believe she came into her marriage with a big *Dustbin* .
■■■ Let’s explore the *”Dustbin Theory”*

☆☆☆ Spiritually, Dustbin plays a significant role in determining the longevity of every relationship.

■■■ *THE ROLES AND USES OF A “DUSTBIN” IN MARRIAGE* 👇

1. *Dustbin is indispensable, anywhere people live together:*

☆☆☆ Everywhere people live, there is a need for Dustbin, be it hospitals, offices, industries or homes. The larger the house or office the bigger the Dustbin you will need.

■■■ Marriage is a journey._

☆☆☆ It is a journey of discovery.
☆☆☆ As You live with your spouse, you will surely see the good, the bad and the ugly.
☆☆☆ Like it happened in John 2:3, marriage wine does finish.
☆☆☆ The initial intoxication of love that couples feel does fizzle out in time.
☆☆☆ This is why marriage should be built on commitment, not on excitement!

☆☆☆ Aside marriage, in families, you are bound to see in your children, siblings and even in-laws, many “Buts” that you may not be proud of.
☆☆☆ As a matter of fact, in every relationship especially in marriage, there is a need for a *Dustbin* .
☆☆☆ This is because without a dustbin in a house where people live, the whole place will be littered with junks.

*Trash in the midst of Treasure:*
☆☆☆ As people come into marriage, they carry two bags; one contains treasure while the other contains trash!
☆☆☆ Like Rachael left her father’s house with some idols and followed her husband Jacob (Gen 31:19), everyone came into marriage with something and not all of them are so pleasant.
☆☆☆ Some came into marriage with broken heart, betrayal of trust, wounded spirit, bitter past and devastating mistakes made in the past.

☆☆☆ Like Rachael came to Jacob with both her baggage and garbage, every one of us also came with our treasure and trash.
☆☆☆ We didn’t just come with our strength, we also came with our weaknesses.
☆☆☆ We didn’t just come with our victories, we also came with our defeats.
☆☆☆ We didn’t just come with our successes, we also came with our failures.

■■■ There is always junk in the trunk!_

2. *The Purpose of Dustbin is to store the waste we generate in the house.*

☆☆☆ Physically while we live together, we generate waste such as leftover food, expired drugs, old clothings, expired plastics etc.
☆☆☆ Similarly while you live with your spouse, wrong words may be spoken out of anger, bad attitudes may be exhibited unwittingly and wrong actions may be displayed.
☆☆☆ It agrees with what Jesus said “it is impossible that no offenses should come…” – Luke 17:1.
☆☆☆ All these offenses must not be allowed to clutter the entire house.

3. *Never Advertise the content of your dustbin.*

☆☆☆ Am sure there are Dustbins in the White House in Washington DC; Buckingham Palace in the United Kingdom and in Vatican City where the Pope lives but we rarely see them in pictures or videos.
☆☆☆ We all know that Dustbins are generally kept outside the house or at a hidden corner of the office or room.
☆☆☆ Am yet to visit a home where the Dustbin is kept on top of the central table in the sitting room.
☆☆☆ Can you imagine a friend telling you to come and take a look in their Dustbin to see the intestines of the chicken they used in preparing pepper soup for you.
☆☆☆ Am sure you may need to contact a psychiatrist on behalf of that friend of yours.

■■■ Nobody advertises the content of his Dustbin because often the content may be decomposing and stinking especially biological waste!
☆☆☆ The content is kept from the eyes of everyone else!
☆☆☆ Similarly you are not permitted to go out there and discuss the failures and weaknesses of your spouse, children and those you are in relationship with.

■■■ *Hello Ma’am, please cover your head!*
☆☆☆ While I have nothing against physically covering of head during church service, I however, desire that we can take a second look at the connection of verse 3 and 5 of 1 Corinthians 11 👇

“But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God. Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonoureth his head. But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoureth her head: for that is even all one as if she were shaven” – 1 Corinthians 11:3‭-‬5.

■■■ Verse 3 made it clear that “the man” is the head of the woman therefore it was commanded that every woman should cover her head “the man”.
■■■ The English Standard Version says “But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God”.

☆☆☆ God wants our women to cover their husbands (heads) and stop exposing them.
☆☆☆ Even in a church’s prayer meeting, don’t say “let us pray for my husband because recently he is heavily drinking alcohol with a side chick”.
☆☆☆ God expects you to cover your husband’s weaknesses and failures in your place of prayers, forgiveness and love.

4. *There is a designated place to dump your refuse when it is filled.*

☆☆☆ A lawyer friend of mine traveled to Accra, Ghana. He bought gala and yoghurt and when he was done eating he threw away their packages at a corner of the street where he was. To his surprise, a little girl of perhaps 14 years accosted him and told him to pick those things up and walk down to the end of the street where he would see a refuse bucket and dump them there. As he picked them, the little girl asked him “are you a Nigerian?” The lawyer told me that he never felt so humiliated all through his life the way he did that day.

■■■ Beloved, we are not permitted to carry the content of our Dustbins and discharge them on our friends, colleagues, neighbours and in-laws. The only designated place to dump our refuse is on Jesus as we pray for our partners, children and those we are in relationship with.
☆☆☆ In very rare cases, you are permitted to dump it with a responsible believer who cares for you.
☆☆☆ Someone who can take your matters to Jesus.
☆☆☆ In John 2, it was not the couple that came to Jesus to tell him that the wine was finished, it was Mary (a 3rd party).
☆☆☆ Please locate your own “Mary” who can willingly talk to Jesus on your behalf if need be.
■■■ Don’t die in silence!

5. *Bring back your Dustbin after discharging the content.*

☆☆☆ The beauty of Dustbin theory is that whenever we finish dumping our refuse, we always return back with our Dustbin.
☆☆☆ This is because we will still need to pack more waste and put them in the Dustbin because as long as we live together, we shall inevitably generate waste.
☆☆☆ You don’t say “this is the last time, you will do this, if you do it again, it is all over”.
☆☆☆ You must make room that frailty belongs to man and your spouse can fail even after making promises.

■■■ *To conclude, practice advance forgiveness!*

☆☆☆ During our courtship, I told my Oxygen (wife), I have forgiven you for all the things you will do that I don’t like for the next 50 years.
☆☆☆ She said the same thing back to me and we laughed.
☆☆☆ Honestly, whenever there is any issue, I still remind myself that I forgave her before she did it.
☆☆☆ That consciousness has helped me navigate through stormy waters.
■■■ Please forgive your spouse, children and others; 50 years to come and mean it.
☆☆☆ By doing so, you will create a spiritual ecosystem that disallows demonic operations.
■■■ Jesus forgave us even before we were born into this world. We must emulate Him!

☆☆☆ Our role model, Jesus stayed with flawed men.
☆☆☆ For three and half years, Jesus lived with twelve men with different orientations, different mindsets and different backgrounds and yet, for once, he never lost his mind.
☆☆☆ Imagine operating daily with boisterous Peter, doubting Thomas, slow-thinking Philip and 419-Judas and yet he never lost his cool.
☆☆☆ He was able to contain their excesses because he had invisible *Dustbins* for all of them.

*PRAYERS*

1. Father, please grant me the grace to discover my area of weakness and deal with it.
2. Oh God my father, please help me to overlook those things I should overlook and discard things I need to discard.
3. I dump into the Dustbin every trash that is against peaceful co-existence between me and my spouse.
4. Father, grant me the grace to forgive my spouse and forget every past misdeeds.
5. Father, give me the grace to forgive myself.
6. I refuse to be the enemy of my marriage.
7. Oh God my father, please change everything that needs to be changed in my marriage.
8. Father, please expose and deal with every secret enemy of my marriage in Jesus name.
9. Oh God my father, please flush out every intruder into my marriage in Jesus name.
10. My marriage is a success.

*PROPHETIC DECLARATIONS*
1. I pray for every married couple, privileged to read this message, God will use this message to transform your marriage for good in Jesus name.
2. I decree, declare and prophesy, your marriage shall become a good example to other marriages in Jesus name.
3. As couples, I decree, your marital life shall not mislead your children in Jesus name.
4. To every marriage going through crisis now, I decree peace into your marriage in Jesus name.
5. To as many marriages experiencing “a finished wine”, I prophesy, Jesus shall step into your marriage this season and joy shall fill your marriage pots in Jesus name.
6. To others experiencing financial crisis, God will supply all your needs beyond your expectations in Jesus mighty name.
7. God who is the author of marriage shall bring to fulfillment his beautiful plans and purposes for your marriage in Jesus name.
8. To those trusting God for God ordained spouses, God will connect you with the bone of your bones this season in Jesus name.
9. To every marriage looking up unto God for the fruit of the womb, I prophesy, your “time of life” is now in Jesus name.
10. At the marriage supper of the Lamb, none of us shall be missing in Jesus name.

Shalom.

Pastor Olutimehin Isaac is a pastor in the Redeemed Christian Church of God.
For prayers and counselling, please call or send me watts app message on 08033916074.
You can also connect me on facebook @ Isaac Olutimehin.
My email address : pastorisaacolutimehin@gmail.com
You may also wish to join any of my prayer groups on facebook 👇
1. I DECREE, DECLARE AND PROPHESY.
2. FRIENDS OF PST OLUTIMEHIN ISAAC.
3. RETURN MY GLORY ( DA OGO MI PADA ).
4. HEAVEN SEEKERS.

God bless you all.

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